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- Speed Limit
- The Gig is up!
- A Presumption of Innocence
- Crime and ...
- Delicates
- Any club that would have me...
- Any port in a storm
- Stop me if you've heard this one
- One Man's Trash
- Radiant
- Parting is such sweet sorrow
- Who Left the Dimensional Portal Open Again?
- I Said I Was Sorry
- Friends Come and Go, but Enemies Accumulate
- Conspiracy
- Labstyles of the Vile and Villainous
- Everyone Has to Start Somewhere
- Even Evil Doctors Get the Blues
- There's always Uncle Ben
- Murder Was the Case That They Gave Me
- A Place to Call My Own
- It's Bigger on the Inside
- Dating is Such Sweet Sorrow
- What a Tangled Web
- Snugglebunny
- Careful What you Ask For
- Do Not Pass "Go"
- Be Home by 8:30
- Strange Befellows
- That Was Premature
- Where Are We Going To Find Rubber Pants Our Size?
- I’d Like a Serving of Community with a Side of Sarcasm
- How Old Are You Now?
- Sounds Like Someone Has Abandonment Issues
- Do You Want To Talk About It?
- Kirby Wuz Here
- Cluckin’ A!
- Cluck Shot First!
- What’s in a Name?
- Hoarders: The Evil Doctor Edition
- That Tingling Feeling is How You Know it’s Working
- Not Again
- I Feel Like Chicken Tonight
- Winners Never Quit
- Meet Bob
- High in Fiber
- You’re Supposed to say `Who’s There`
- Don’t Try This At Home
- A Mystery Pummeled by an Enigma
- That Not So Fresh Feeling
- Did You Get a New Hairdo?
- Dreadlocks
- All Alone in the Moonlight
- A Picture Says a Thousand Things You Didn’t Want to Say
- Apology Not Accepted
- No Good Deed Goes Unpunished
- Where’s My Parade?
- Not Exactly Millions of Voices
- Here’s Johnny!
- Slow News Day
- Just Say No
- Off to a Slow Start
- Watch Out Man!
- If You Can’t Beat Them…
- A good man always knows his limitations
- What is the Sound of One Opposite Generating?
- Sibling Rivalry
- That’s Despicable!
- The Sincerest Form of Flattery
- Like a Big Pizza Pie
- You’re Going to Need a Bigger Boat
- Hum a Few Bars
- It Saves on Transaction Fees
- Nothing Personal
- A Thousand Channels And Nothing Is On
- Just a Little Prick
- Alcohol Preserves Everything Except Dignity
- Happiness is a Warm Blanket
- Hiding in Plane Sight
- I wonder if this is how Nomad felt…?
- Villainy Never Takes a Vacation
- What Goes Around
- It Isn’t Polite To Stare
- Good Help is Hard to Find
- For Every Action…
- Afterbirth
- You’ll Speak When Spoken To
- Of Course You Realize This Means War
- Oh The Humanity
- Pax Super-Sapiens
- Happy Trails
- Know When to Fold ‘Em
- Sucks To Be You
- I Didn’t Get A Harrumph From That Guy!
- Game Over, Man! Game Over!
- No Paddle For You
- Don’t Try This At Home, Kids!
- I Was Vengeance Before It Was Cool
- The Price is Wrong
- Heal Thyself
- Stop Me If You’ve Heard This One
- Bert’s Revenge
- With a Little Help From My Friends
- Just Snapping a Quick Selfie
- I’m All Over Social Media
- Found Him!
- Try, Try Again
- Don’t Meet Your Idol Kids
- Do Not Arouse the Wrath of the Great and Powerful Oz
- Constructive Criticism
- Protective Custody
- Abracadabra
- Everyone’s a Critic
- It makes the world go ’round
- Layers. Like an onion.
- Break on Through
- Finally, A Straight Answer
- Not Batman
- Secondhand Tolkien is Dangerous Too
- We don’t got the beat
- A’int quite the Mines of Moria
- Minions. Why did it have to be Minions?
- It doesn’t have to be a snowman
- Someday We’ll Find It
- And me without my baggy pants
- Tools come in all sizes
- Indignities abound
- Bliss
- This Ain’t Motel Six
- Can it Gizmo
- Doomed To Repeat It
- Reset the Wayback Machine, Sherman. We broke something.
- It’s Not The Fall That Kills You…
- Hey, it’s a living…
- Elementary
- My Heart Will Go On
- Come Fly With Me
- Betelgeuse, Betelgeuse
- I need a volunteer from the audience
- Ace of Dummies
- Who doesn’t enjoy a good smiting?
- Thief of Hearts and Samsungs
- A Hole in my Heart
- I Feel Pretty, So Pretty
- The Secret Ingredient is Love
- Just like the old age home
- I love a parade
- Still no hover boards?
- Trick or …
- The Devil’s Workshop
- Is Caring
- A little bit of the ultra-cleaning
- Bring me my brown shirt…and hat…and goggles
- Hmm, depends…
- Search your Feelings…
- The Ministry Of Silly Talks
- Cannonball!
- Is it 420 Already?
- Operation Snatch and Grab
- The fool or the fool who follows the fool
- Swipe Left Young Man
- Want some cheese with that whine?
- Just a pinch…
- Love me as though there were no tomorrow
- Worst part of waking up
- Never Miss a Day
- Nobody knows…
- Is it still cannibalism if you’re a chicken?
- What Ever Happened to Judge Rheinhold?
- And she smelled of elderberries
- Even more ripping off the classics
- Wheel of Morality Says: Eat more fiber!
- Oathbreaker
- Side effects include
- Phrasing?
- Under the water, the fish don’t stink
- I take my misery with two sugars
- You’ll have to excuse my friend. He’s a little slow.
- Sprinkles are for winners
- We should pull over for gas
- Where there’s a whig, there’s a way
- And On Your Right, Yet Another Seattle Burnt Coffee Shop
- Draw Me Like One of Your French Girls
- Couldn’t hit the broadside of a…
- I Don’t Have a Square to Spare
- Gonna Fly Now
- Mission One Eight Seven
- Faceless No Longer
- And don’t come down until you’re ready to apologize!
- The Sebastian Confrontation
- Life Finds a Way
- Nothing wrong with a bit of bribery between friends
- Widdle Wiggy Woogums
- Sometimes the Laundry Sorts You
- Circle of Life
- Snards. Its what’s for dinner.
- Don’t blow your wig
- 10,000 ways that won’t work
- Actually, they’re kinda bland till you scoop sugar on ’em.
- Only yourselves to blame
- Splitter!
- At least you don’t handle his “delicates”
- If You Could Go Ahead and Do That…That’d be Greeeeaaat!
- Why Put Off Tomorrow What You Can Do Today
- PC Load Letter? What the F@#$ does that mean?
- Night gathers, and now my watch begins.
- Light ‘Em Up
- And I thought he smelled bad on the outside
- That’s the Power of Pine-Sol, Baby!
- Yo soy la noche
- I’ve seen enough hentai to know what happens next…
- ONE OF US. ONE OF US. ONE OF US.
- Need a little pick me up
- Superheroing ain’t easy
- I’ll packa your bags for your trip.
- The Adventures of The Possum!
- The Adventures of The Cockroach
- And now I forgot my social security number!
- A Crummy Caper
- I Said Good Day Sir!
- Um, look, if we built this large wooden badger…
- A Soggy Situation
- But all the other villains make fun of my chin
- Overcompensating Much?
- What are these? Girl Scout Cookies for Ants?
- The Real Reason Invulnerable Superheroes Need Super Suits
- Hold Onto Your Butts
- The Asparagus Strikes Back
- When you wish upon a star
- Kitty Perry Sings the Blues
- I hope the flying piranhas are house broken
- My Secret Identity Disorder
- A Song of Wait and Wonder
- Nobody Puts Soda Popinski in the Corner
- Thank you sir, may I have another?
- Men at Work
- Why not Southpaw Sundays?
- Grab your ankles, please
- I prefer starlight mints in mine…
- Lowered Expectations Means You’ll Never be Disappointed
- Make a like a tree…and get back to work!
- Probably just picked the first word in the dictionary
- It clearly said ‘Do Not Touch’
- Time for a time out
- That Fourth Wall’s Lookin’ Kinda Flimsy
- Who weeps for the aardvark?
- I see what you’re driving at…
- It was bound to happen
- The Creative Process Needs a Shove
- Something old is something new
- Mmmmm…Chocolate
- Also presenting, the bleeps, the sweeps and the creeps
- A thing that someone says to cause amusement or laughter
- Sadder than a discount Valentine
- Well, what if there is no tomorrow? There wasn’t one today.
- At least it’s out of it’s misery
- That’s two minutes for whining
- Really Driving These Puns
- Started at the Bottom
- Customer Disservice
- You Light Up My Life
- April Blizzards Bring May…Blizzards?
- A job most foul
- There goes his tip
- Writers can be vindictive
- You can’t draw and goof off at the same time
- I wish this strip would draw itself…
- Every job can be automated…
- I guess this makes me the tool
- Well Noted…
- You’re Big in Japan
- Never make a promise you’d hate to keep
- Maybe if you hum a few bars?
- Don’t ask about the cheese…
- Well, here’s another nice mess you’ve gotten me into
- Sometimes you need lackeys in bulk
- Still probably safer than most street meat.
- I’m a doctor not an orthographer!
- You know what? That’s gonna hurt.
- Catches on quick, doesn’t he?
- I think his ears look funny
- He’s getting real good at it, too.
- He’s getting hip to the get down
- Kiss me like you miss me
- Heaven help you if they’re not in season!
- At least she’s not asking for brunch…
- The leading cause of misery for artists is writers
- Everyone thinks they can write.
- Some situations are seldom swashed swiftly when buckles...
- If you want something done right, do it yourself.
- Not responsible for hair in awkward places.
- Sleeping the sleep of the innocent, despite myself
- I wouldn’t say I’ve been missing it, Bob
- Clean up your act before I get back!
- It’s like the eye follows you wherever you go.
- I haven’t had a decent sacrifice in ages
- I couldn’t carrot all
- Now he’s the Atomized Avenger
- There go the best fries in Hero City
- Everybody wants to be a star
- You’re gonna be in trouble when mom gets home.
- Lights out on Cell Block D
- Now just wait a second…
- He’s a big fan
- That’s some heavy funk
- Some say it’s still at large till this very day…
- Those marvelous scammers sure scammed us, huh?
- You might be a Targaryen
- You pay what you get for…or something like that.
- The muse has struck
- Gesundheit!
- Your Freudian slip is showing…
- Time to make the donuts.
- In Hero City, egg beats you!
- Wait, people actually read this comic?
- Nobody puts Baby in the corner.
- Give That Monkey A Typewriter!
- Speedsters are big jerks.
- How do you make a goth giggle?
- If you keep making that face, it’ll stay that way.
- A mime is a terrible thing to waste.
- Gonna need a steamer to get that out.
- We want the funk.
- Stuck in the middle with you.
- Don’t go getting all choked up now.
- Avoid the prat-falls of comedy.
- I think he’s finally getting it
- Please apply again at a later time. Much later.
- That’s why it’s called ‘Duty’.
- He’s in serious treble.
- Chillin’ like a villain
- Radio Blah Blah
- Candygram for Mongo?
- Not going anywhere for a while?
- Head over heels for his art.
- I before me except after thee
- Ah hell, give me a white wine spritzer.
- Wake me up when December ends.
- This show stinks.
- No one is in comics for the money.
- Why go high when you can go low?
- Eight out of nine ain’t bad
- Ching Chang Walla Walla Bing Bang.
- Who wants a Hertz Donut?
- Toss this gag in the ditcher.
- This is why I take baths.
- I like coffee. It gives me the illusion that I'm be awake
- Wait, Wilhemina?
- Does this glow look infected?
- Family Matters.
- I’m not throwing away my shot.
- Don’t forget to tap your mana.
- Why did you say that name!?
- He’s only mostly dead.
- The plumage don’t enter into it.
- Hold Still
- I don’t think that’s sanitary
- You keep on knocking but you can’t come in.
- I don’t have a square to spare.
- Did someone hear a snap?
- Social Distance Creativity Disorder
- Social Distance is Working.
- The reaper does not listen to the harvest
- Groovy
- Do your ears hang low?
- Stealing power is better for the environment
- It’s so mindbogglingly useful!
- Funk Sole Brother
- They love me on eBay
- This is not the way
- She misses her lil’ Boopsie
- Prison changes you
- Oink Bro
- Can Timmy come out to play?
- They’re all gonna laugh at you
- Wipe your feet!
- Gotta catch ’em all
- Hush now, Mama’s here
- I’ve got something in my eye
- What’s that dirt on your chin?
- Stay-cation!
- Yoink!
- Don’t call it a comeback
- That tingling feeling means it’s working!
- For a nice and shiny coat…
- It’s a Dog Groomed Shame
- Splish Splash
- How to Zoom
- Twisted up like a Rubik’s Cubist
- Infernal Delivery
- Sorry…Affogato your name
- Something fishy is going on.
- Not bad. Cod do better.
- Out of the frying pan?
- The sea is dark and full of terrors.
- No chance of parole now…
- This one is driving me crazy
- Caped Caper
- It’s all fun and games until someone ends up in a cone
- How do you plead?
- Misery loves company
- Did you get the memo?
- In space, no one can hear you telemarket.
- 404 Joke Not Found
- Bodacious
- He’s gonna go hungry…
- Everybody’s a Loki
- And finally, monsieur, a wafer-thin mint.
- Netflix and …
- It’s in beta
- That’s not write…
- I have the power!
- Mouth for What?
- Dammit Jim!
- One more thing…
- You can’t expect much from us.
- How about an extended warranty?
- Lawyer up bruh
- I won’t ask again…
- These strips keep on rollin’
- That was easy!
- Not the Bees!
- In the back of a Volkswagen?
- Freaky Friday?
- Make like a tree and GTFO
- Am I supposed to be punishing myself?
- Like, Take a Chill Pill
- Same Crap, Different Year
- Somebody order fried spam?
- Kitchen Nightmares
- Today’s Forecast: My own private hell
- Be sure to file in triplicate
- At least death is final
- To The Moon!
- We always call each other Gopherllas
- Are Henchmen Claimed as Dependents or Furniture?
- I hear they’re scruffy lookin’
- Smell ya later.
- At least they wore seatbelts
- Rock the Cantina
- Same damn time…same damn channel
- Bros before heroes
- It’s not me, it’s you.
- Heinously Sad
- Why the long face?
- Bark at the moon
- It’s dark. And we’re wearing sunglasses.
- Definitely not a bird
- It’s not the fall that’ll kill you
- And we’re running now.
- No Capes!
- I bet this never happens to Clark Kent
- I don’t think the disguise is working…
- Get off our lawn, youngin’
- With a Minor in Dastardly Arts
- I don’t think he gets it.
- Nothing gets by you…
- You don’t have to go home, but…
- Underwear Goes Inside The Pants Policy
- As Seen on TV
- Definitely Number Two
- Not my best work…
- Mark loves extra mayo and pickles
- Should we tell him we lost track?
- Forcing creative work is like forcing a fart…
- I’m a writer, not a laborer.
- Attack The Block
- Kickstart My Heart
- The Usual Anxiety
- From hell’s heart I stab at thee
- Hold on a minute…
- Out of this world
- Guten Tag Krankenschwester
- Keeping on Track
- Instructions Unclear
- He’s got the glow
- I’m all outta bubblegum
- We’ve actually heard worse pitches
- I’m out.
- Don’t You (Forget About Me)
- Out of the pan…
- La Femelle Fatale
- Nobody calls me…chicken
- Obsession
- Are we expecting more than one?
- Elaine’s Revenge
- Crikey what a drongo
- Kentucky Fried Cluck
- He’ll be back, right?
- Well that escalated QUICKLY
- You stay classy Hero City
- When will it end?
- Have you tried anvils?
- Not laughing WITH you…
- Leave No Witnesses
- Now with more cannon fodder
- Barely got to know him
- Plug it back in and maybe it’ll work
- We got a runner!
- A road much traveled
- Do I need a breath mint?
- Which way is he going?
- What has he been eating?
- I’m not falling for this again.
- Haggar has ‘em wholesale
- You must construct additional pylons
- Act First. Plan Never.
- This little piggy said, ‘Yes Please’.
- Seek Help
- Negotiations are somewhat rocky at best
- Beats solving your problems
- The resemblance is uncanny!
- I could park this car in the shadow of his…
- Don’t tase me bro!
- Everything but the kitchen sink.
- Don’t make me come in there!
- Katnip Everdeen
- It’s so hard to say goodbye to yesterday.
- When the void stares back…
Creator
At long last, a battle for the ages! Captain Righteous vs. Captain Heinous! What could possibly go awry?!? Oh yeah, that whole evenly matched thing. I guess maybe we shouldn’t have been so literal. Eh, oh well. Maybe we can correct it in yet another reboot.
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